Week 38 Stare at the Sky
This week were were asked to find some grass, lie down and stare at the sky and make some shapes.
I really liked the sound of this experiment, as I’ve got older I’ve realised I derive a lot of pleasure from the more simpler things in life.
Every August work organises an annual trek up an ancient hillfort in my home town- where countryside service takes up a load of lilo’s, flasks of hot chocolate and tins of cake at 9pm in a land rover and we the walkers follow up in a more leisurely fashion. Why are we going up for a walk when it’s getting dark you ask ? Well! It's to lie on the lilo’s and stare at the sky ! It’s when the shooting stars come out to play for the Perseid Meteor Shower. Last year I went with a group of friends from work. As I lay on my selected lilo for about 40 minutes I heard oo’s and ah’s from the others who were seeing all sorts of marvellous things across the sky, that voice of self-doubt in my head was saying… why can’t I see them, what’s wrong with me, I never see anything exciting. Fast forward half an hour later when I had just about given up hope of even seeing a little one -there was this huge light in the sky and I was delighted to have the privilege of seeing the most amazing comet trailing across the sky like a huge beacon. I had to pinch myself it was an amazing view, when describing it afterwards I have gone as far as calling it a life changing experience ( no joke) and that jabbing self -doubt quickly evapourated. I then heard some familiar voices and was delighted to find out lying nearby were a a couple I had known for years which made the evening even more enjoyable.
I’ve also been lucky enough to visit Iceland with my beau, where we travelled into the volcanic hills to stand around puffa jackets and enough woolly things to reupholster the original sheep in complete darkness and freezing cold to be rewarded with a glimpse of the elusive Northern Lights. It rose like a green angel with huge wings over the hill tops, another hugely memorable stare at the sky moment.
So last week, my mission was to find a piece of grass, lie down and stare at the sky. I’d had a hot and busy day with lots of driving but the sky was a vibrant blue so I saw my opportunity and headed up the hills beyond the house to where I thought I would have no interruptions. As I lay in this field I tuned in to myself looking at the blue sky- no clouds today just blueness everywhere and calm. I listened to my mind and to my body which has been too busy for a long time, I know I have been batting away aches and pains and niggles until I have more time to deal with them, I’ve been stressed and naggy. I grounded myself and this is the moment I was reminded of my crystals. When life gets busy I tend to get a bit flighty and I get clumsy and awkward and just feel dislocated from everyone and everything around me I have to ground myself. A few years back I got interested in the concept of chakras, grounding and crystals and attended a brief course, I was fascinated by them and for a long time I carried one around with me in my bra ( next to my heart chakra) like a lucky talisman , I like to think that this is why knights of long ago had jewels on their swords for protection. Not that I am being ambushed on a daily basis by people trying to kill me but I am constantly battling negative influences and being over sensitive to negativity and therefore in my minds eye I’ve come out of Mr Ben’s dressing room kitted out in amour brandishing a sword to banish any negative emotions and toxic people. During this time of crystal obsession we had to go through a process in work where we had to fight for our positions through a court type situation and go before a ‘jury’ made up of county councillors and management to tell them why we were worth the salary we were on and indeed keep or current positions. It was an intimating and humiliating ordeal and without my boulder size citrine crystal in my bra making me look very lopsided I honestly don’t think I could have done it. Somehow I dug deep and I convinced them not to reduce my salary as they did to many of my colleagues. Anyway back to the experiment I loved the feeling of being enveloped by the earth and of been supported and accepted. As I lay there lost in my own world I failed somehow to hear a group of off roading motorbikes come up the valley. As I came to , I scrambled to my feet and brushed myself down as they opened the gate to the field to travel past me to go further into the wilderness,, hrmph is there no peace to be had I thought to myself a bit annoyed that my moment had been interrupted …. until the last biker came along to shut the gate, and was struggling with holding his bike and the latch so I said to him – ‘I’ll do it for you, you go ahead.’ He turned to me and said –‘ I know you don’t I ?’and said my name. By now I was getting a bit red in the face from being caught lying in a field in the middle of the afternoon and being on the back foot with him knowing me and me having no idea who he was - to be fair he was wearing a helmet! He turned out to be someone I’d hung out with when I was about 13 and hadn’t really seen since. I think we may have had a little kiss way back then and shared some illicit cigarettes… crikey some 33 years ago, until my Dad told him to clear off and leave me alone ( ever the protective!) I stumbled home feeling as ungrounded as ever but a little light from my encounter thinking what a small world we live in. That evening I decided to unearth my box of crystals and take them all out to be recharged in the full moon…
On Friday I wanted to give the experiment another chance. So off I went up another mountain with spectacular views close to where I work. Walking uphill is also very grounding and this time I took up some crystals with me. I took my time to watch the clouds as they were traveling very fast in the windy conditions, no bumping into to past childhood sweethearts today just a lovely grounding morning taking some photos . On Saturday I went to a festival with some friends and I felt very mellow as we sat in some deck chairs alternating people watching with cloud watching. I do so love these simpler experiments, they let me open my mind, tune in and slow down a do a little rebooting. As a result my crystals are back in my life, I’ve booked myself a massage to ease my aches and pains and I’m treating myself to some geranium scented baths and some self -compassion not possibly what Chris had in mind but for me a positive move forward.
Rolling hills from Jubilee Tower - Moel Fammau
me and the festival with those wonderful clouds!