Fresh Start

I have written diary notes for most of my life. I find it really helpful to self-analyse, if I am analysing myself I am generally leaving the analysis of others alone.

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Sep 20, 2018
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When I read the introduction back to myself, I sound like a scientist, but I’m not a qualified scientist. I am just little me. I was going to write old in-between little and me. However, as time continues to pass, that word ‘old’ is no longer a quip.

Last week I posted about walking the walk instead of talking the talk and there was a reason for it. I spoke about setting your own pace, and this was important. I was sharing words, because I had set my own pace too high. I was trying to make great leaps forward in my own life, but in truth, neither my mind nor body were ready and up for the tasks ahead.

I have to laugh at myself, if you’ve read a few of my posts here on life labs, I believe laughter is good for my mind, body and soul. I’ve always enjoyed laughing at myself and comedians but, when it comes to professionalism and education, I don’t have a great recall for laughter, it was generally all work and no fun. But, I am headed off track. I am here to chat about my own recent stupidity. I feel I can call myself stupid, because I have been self-learning now for over three years and I still have the capability to make some silly mistakes.

As part of my own strategy for taking control of my own life, and taking snippets from the coaching worksheets, the ones were we review our inner-critic and coach, and I noticed that the voice of my own critic was so loud when I actively chose to listen and it was because I’d neglected it.

I am going to call my inner critic 'my body' from now on, because I feel my inner critic likes to believe the body is such an extra-ordinary mechanism that it can look after itself.

In recent months I have begun to notice my body doesn’t quite look after itself. It is a result of what my mind chooses to believe, and the actions of my mindset. I am going to call my mindset my inner coach. Sadly, neither the critic or the coach were communicating with each other.  

I’d mentioned back in spring that I would like to think my inner coach and critic could have a meeting more than once in a while and learn to work together. After this comment, an opportunity arose to join a gym for the summer. It was quite an offer, a whole three months for the price of two and full membership; I could access the pool, the classes, the gym (did I say I am not a fan of the gym per se) and more. I arranged a meeting with my inner critic and coach via fifteen minutes of journalling and concluded: What have I got to lose? I will put myself forward over the summer and try every single class, to remind me – what suits me?! (Did I say, I despise the word ‘Gym!’)

I am always one for quality and value for money and I worked out that in attending a minimum of three classes a week, if I had been paying at full price, it would have cost just short of £15.00 a week and really when counting copper, who wants to spend that much on exercise per week? Anyway, I tallied a visual of 3 sessions a week over 3 months and that would approximately have cost me £193.50. I know you don’t know me, so let my critic and coach be clearer, that figure was not something I wanted to think about or buy into.

The summer pass was £60 and suddenly appeared to me as an absolute bargain. So, I joined, and I decided to get my children a summer swim pass, because they are old enough to swim alone, and I thought, if I am going to get my mind and body working together, I shall also align the family. The swim pass for children was £22.00 for 6 weeks, and it may have seemed pricey, but again, when I considered the cost for an adhoc 3 sessions a week over 6 weeks, if I wasn’t a member this would have cost £54 per child, again, the pass was cheap at less than half the price. I talked about the opportunity with a friend and she decided to do the same. We are now motivating each other.

I appreciate this opportunity is not available to everyone especially for the families with under 8s unless you have amazing sitters. I’ve had to wait twelve years for this opportunity because leisure centres rarely have child care facilities and I am not a fan of ‘Gyms’, because ‘Gym membership’ could often feel like entrapment in my past - pay up, and even if your motivation shifts, we have a contractual agreement for 12 months.

I know I could have exercised at home, but I needed a little socialisation, and accepting this opportunity for three months, at a deal, it was dare I say it – perfect timing. I have realised I like Zumba, and Step Aerobics and I am very un-coordinated having ignored the body over the recent years because I thought it could look after itself. Aqua Aerobics is a lot of fun and I dabbled in a bit of Kettle Exercise, and wow, the fitness instructor is a lively lady. I watch on as she smiles and lifts, while I grimace and heave. I am only lifting 4kg but it’s tough.

I also know it’s tougher because I’d allowed my body to give up listening to itself and just trusted muscles could look after themselves.

As the weeks have passed, I consider myself to be attending the gym for free, because, I have tried so many classes just for the fun and in the learning process had a few laughs at myself, and I still have more classes to try out. The membership doesn’t end until mid-October 2018. I am on a roll, or so I thought.

As the mind and the body began working together, I have begun to believe even after only 8 weeks of physical improvement, that I was ready for anything. I set myself a challenge to go on a 20 mile walk. It was a charity walk with the family. It sounded like fun. I thought I was ready. I thought I could do it. But, as with most opportunities and actions in life, we are more successful if we are motivated, experienced and physically prepared.  

As this blog is turning into a bit of a novella, I will let you know what happened next week, because a situation shared is a situation halved.

Take care of you.


Image: Pexels - Photo


Go to the profile of J. Spencer

J. Spencer

Creative Writing Practice

Proud to be an Ambassador for Psychologies Magazine. I'm practised in self-publishing eBooks and blogging. I have a website that shares my own personal journey, creative writing, and ideas as I seek and find my own niche, maybe it's chatting about Lifestyle Choices. I hope to encourage and empower others to write creatively and find a sense of self through words, a personal niche, or maybe - simply - a peace in mind. Being kind to others and ourselves is my motivation. I am a book lover, 'Don't tell my husband!' Interested in Drama, Fantasy and Satire, sometimes the poet. I enjoy Technology and Digital Communication, whilst setting clear boundaries. I value professionalism, and integrity.

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