Finding meaning

There is no meaning without context. We make sense of things within the way our life is. When life changes, the meaning made also shifts. If meaning is a theme you are pondering at the moment, read on...

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A loss of meaning is a painful experience. It may be that a cherished job role no longer seems to have a purpose, hobbies that lose their edge, relationships that have gone flat, or even that life itself feels devoid of a reason. It may be that something has changed in your life, for example the end of a relationship, the loss of a loved one, or the growing of your children.

I experience loss of meaning as a disconnection. I say this because most often when connection is found, meaning seems to follow. A good question when meaning is missing is therefore 'what am I not noticing?'

Of course, if you knew, you would have meaning already. So, here are some ways you may be able to tap into what matters to find your own personal meaning:

1. Change the perspective from which you are looking

For example, if you are a service provider, step into the shoes of the people who choose to use your service. What do they value? What do they see?


Or, think of things from the perspective of the friend that keeps in touch even though you push them away. What do they know that you are not acknowledging?


Also, stepping back and looking at a situation as if you were a fly on the wall can be a big help to notice things that are not apparent from our own perspective.

2. Change the time perspective you consider

Ask yourself, how important will this be in 5 years time? Why? What is it that matters long term?

Or, write the obituary you would like to read about yourself. What does this tell you about what matters deep down? What perspective does this add to your current concerns?

3. Take some time noticing the here and now.


Meaning can come from the most simple things. Oftentimes it is entirely free.

Take a mindful walk where you walk slowly and just notice what is around you. Birds singing, plants growing, breeze one your face...what is it that is already there if you slow down and give it space? When you are tuned in to what is around you, it can change your perspective where you feel blocked.

If you would like to talk about meaning in your life, then please get in touch.

Go to the profile of Fe Robinson, Psychotherapist

Fe Robinson, Psychotherapist

I am here to help you thrive, whatever life brings. I offer Psychotherapy, EMDR therapy and Couples Counselling to clients based in Durham. I am UKCP Accredited and an EMDR Europe Practitioner, and offer Clinical Supervision to counsellors and psychotherapists locally. I have worked in private practice, the NHS, and in charitable organisations, with a wide range of clients and conditions.

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