I heard this wonderful phrase a few weeks ago, and it has really stayed with me. Amidst the chaos of family life I smiled wryly at the idea of lingering at all, let alone spaciously!
As I left the concept to percolate, I began to recognise how much it chimed with my experience of what it is that makes psychotherapy impactful.
In a therapy session, there is a spaciousness. There’s no expectation of what needs to get done or be covered, no pressure to be a certain way. It’s an exploration. A dialogue. A gentle, respectful way of being with whatever it is that’s on your mind and in your body.
Part of what makes therapy impactful is that it lingers. Curiosity is a key aspect of the process. Whatever it is that’s experienced, there is a wondering how this is the case, how it is that we experience it this particular way. Rather than continually moving on to the next thing, we linger, we make space, and we hold attention where it is. When we do, new insights, different perspectives, and more information emerges.
You may come to understand how different aspects of your experience connect to each other. You may feel your feelings more fully. You may realise that you have been holding on to ideas about yourself or the world that are no longer relevant.
Whatever it is that you are aware of, the beauty of consciousness is that there is always more to discover. When you linger spaciously, a little more can bubble up to the surface, awareness can expand, and knowing can become an integrated, felt experience that encompasses what you think, what you feel, and what you sense in your body.
I’m challenging myself to linger spaciously in other areas of my life, and it’s doing me the power of good. A few breaths, a pause to enjoy the sunlight, or listen to the birds, tiny moments are bringing me back to myself and my surroundings. Let’s face it, we all need a little time to catch up with ourselves, especially when we’re moving at pace.
For online psychotherapy that lingers and offers space, get in touch.