Adventure as an everyday choice

What if adventure was an everyday choice to honour something we value? How would we set our lives up differently?

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When I started my coaching training, one of the first activities we did was to identify our values. We completed an exercise where we explored our peak moments (those times when you're just so lost in the moment that time seems irrelevant). We explored what it was about those times that felt so right and from there we identified our core values.

Adventure was one of my top values. So with the focus on adventure this month, I thought I'd remind myself of its definition... "An unusual and exciting or daring experience."

My mind automatically associates adventure with BIG. I think of those moments where I threw caution to the wind and took a big leap. But the thing about adventure in that context is that it's kind of limiting. What about the everyday moments?

What if adventure was a daily choice? What if it was as simple as allowing ourselves to listen to what's in our hearts and take the lead instead of sitting back? Or maybe adventure might be owning our own opinions and voicing them, even though they might not be the most popular?

I've been very aware that I "should" be adventuring this month but in a way that makes me kind of resist it. I've been questioning what adventures I've actually had this month and I see they're very different to my previous ones. Whilst I'm not quitting my job or travelling for five weeks with the family, I am still adventuring.

I'm taking an adventure in me and I'm really pushing my comfort zone. What that means for me is I'm having the uncomfortable, courageous conversations that I would normally avoid. I'm checking in with myself and discovering what I feel, instead of relying on what appears logical or focusing on others needs and feelings. I'm allowing myself to voice my feelings without editing. I'm asking for what I want without being attached to the outcome. I'm staying in the conflict when it arises, instead of changing the subject or running for the hills.

I'm all for simple things that grow our core muscles. So if you want adventures that will really grow you, why not try some of these? ...

  • State your opinion freely in conversations that you would normally hold back in.
  • Ask for what you need instead of responding to everyone else's needs.
  • Feel what you feel instead of rationalising everything.
  • Stay in the difficult conversation, even when it's tough going.
  • Be clear that you're happy to say yes when you do.
  • Practice saying no to the things that you don't want to do but would normally go along with.
  • Notice when you're reacting to someone else and ask yourself what part of you they're mirroring.
  • Turn a complaint about something into an action.
  • Say when you've got something wrong, particularly if it's something that's hard for you.
  • Tell someone close to you what you see in them and what you appreciate in them.
  • Acknowledge and praise the little things people do around you.
  • Notice at the end of the day what went well instead of focusing on what didn't.
  • Practice radical self care instead of putting yourself last on the list.
  • Get out in nature.
  • Dance and move your body.

Adventure as an everyday choice for me is about pushing the status quo. It's about not allowing myself to stay on the sidelines and instead jumping into what's real for me in the moment. Sometimes I speak my truth and it isn't popular, so the adventure becomes learning to be ok with that discomfort. Other times it's about stopping when I'm spinning in overwhelm and the taking time to slow down and practice self care.

Your definition of what's daring and exciting is personal to you. Don't get caught up in dogma or other people's versions of adventure. One adventure isn't better than another, unless of course you're not giving yourself permission to have what they're having!

Vanessa Anstee

Life Coach

I'm inspired by who you can be without apology and I want to help you let your real self shine. I've been a life coach for 10 years. I've always been a seeker trying to discover a way of being in life that feels soulful, authentic and aligned to what my heart wants not what my head thinks I should have, be or do. I spent 20+ year career in HR, OD, talent management and executive coaching. My kids were my biggest wake up. I saw the way I was working wasn't working anymore. I couldn't keep pushing myself harder. I had to accept I couldn't attain this perfected version of myself that I had strived most of my life to achieve. I had to find love not from accolades and other people's acceptance but from deep inside me. That's when I learnt to connect to my heart, heal my childhood wounds and fears of never being enough and set light to my passion in a completely new way. I want one thing for my clients. Be real. Be themselves, fall madly in love with that person and honour their soul's calling.