Covid, community and why we need to be like trees

This week will see our worlds change. Numbers will rise fast, schools will close, lock down UK will start and the world we lived last week will be vastly different. So what can we do to look after each other?

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We need to be like trees

Now, more than ever, with covid in the air, we need to be like trees.  Trees whose root structures go deep underground linking and supporting the old and the young, the healthy and the ill.  We need to act like trees sending out roots and shoots to those in our woods, because if one tree falls, the whole eco-system is weaker for it and we know that this virus will see trees fall.

There is a danger when we are scared that we go into flight ( lock ourselves away safely and don’t look out for anyone else), fight (take all the toilet roll and keep it for yourself even if someone else needs it), freeze (do what the government tells us to do without thinking for ourselves or go into denial ‘it’s just like flu’, ‘it only effects the old’) or flock (a bit like freeze, doing what everyone else does without thinking things through).

So understanding the severity of the situation is necessary in order to understand what can and can’t be controlled.  We can’t magic up nurses and doctors from no-where but we can make sure we are not putting our self in the way of the virus so as to avoid overwhelming NHS staff.  We do not know who has it and who hasn’t, but we can limit who we come into contact with and how we do it.

Practical ways we can look after each other

We also need to see that we have more power than we think and can make a difference to our own communities rather than waiting for big brother to sort it out for us.  If ever there was a time to decentralize, this is it.

So what can we do to look after all the trees in our woods?

  • Physically distance yourself  – bugger herd immunity and read what the scientists are saying (above).  If you physically distance yourself, you can’t catch it or pass it on and so save the NHS and other people.  I don’t like the words ‘self-isolate’  we do not need more isolation at a time like this and it is inaccurate.
  • De-isolate yourself – at this stressful time the last thing we need to do is to shut ourselves in and away.  We are so fortunate to have telephones, the internet and all the various messaging and video-calling apps and platforms.  At this time it is crucial to stay in touch, to get support from each other
  • Set up a local Facebook group – and I mean really local – your block, your estate, your road.  Then use this to connect with each other.  If there are people around you who can’t work or don’t have technology to connect with, then give them your old laptops and send the person in your family who is least at risk around to their house to teach them how to connect.
  • Use the Facebook group to:
    • Share tips for how to look after each other
    • Organise shopping trips or deliveries so that only one person is going out at a time, who has the virus and needs food or toilet role dropping off.
    • Get to know the people around you because when (and it is only a matter of time) we are all at home, these are the people who on hand to do things for you if they can.
  • Set up a phone system to connect with people who live alone or are vulnerable; bring them in, don’t shut them out.
  • Shop in local stores.  Keep small businesses going and also avoid putting yourself at risk by going to larger stores
  • Continuing paying small businesses even if you can’t use their services this month, or the next, or the next.  If you love the massage you can’t get to, the indie-coffee shop you aren’t going to, the family run bed and breakfast where you can’t at the moment take your weekend breaks – why not pay them anyway?  You have budgeted for it and without your money they won’t survive.  If we keep investing in these small, local businesses we are not only looking after our own interests in keeping them going, but we are doing that which government isn’t, we are showing we care enough about other people to invest in them.
  • Set up local (street, block, estate) food banks for those who need them so they don’t have to travel so far.
  • Buy, eat  and waste less so you have to go to the shops less, so that there is less strain on producers who may be hit.  Most of us consume way too much
  • Share your skills locally. I’m a teacher so when the schools close, I’ll be on line for the kids I teach but also anyone else’s kids who I can help with either their studies or their worries.  If you’re a working from home accountant, can you help out the small businesses who are struggling?  If you are a carpenter and these winds continue to rattle fences and roofs can you be the person locally who shows up to fix that.  And to do it for free.  Because we can. Because if one tree falls, all our roots are a bit stronger.
  • Sponsor people – if the neighbour’s kids can’t afford to use some of the on-line learning platforms below – pay for them yourself, if you neighbour would like to join an on-line group for support but can’t afford the fee – pay for it, if they need to upgrade to a faster broadband – pay for it.
  • Share what you are doing with your family.  How are you occupying small children who can’t go to soft play or the cinema?  Or teenagers who are bored and want to stay in bed all day?
  • Structure your days – don’t just surrender to endless scrolling and snoozing.  Keep a routine going include:
    • Some time moving/exercising (outside if you are lucky enough to have your own garden).  walk, do star jumps, learn yoga or Tai Chi on line, dance in the kitchen, do squats by the door.
    • Some learning – use Udemy, Moocs, or FutureLearn
    • Some social time – on phones, messages, chats
    • Some social play – cards, monopoly etc
    • Some silent reading
    • some creativity – making food, gardening, learning to knit or sew or saw
    • some time alone
    • time collectively – doing something together with the other people in your house
    • some mindfulness or meditation
  • Re-prioritise your life and values, to learn what you always wanted.
  • Think for yourself – what more can you do to support yourself and those around you?
  • Thank people who have meant something to you – Phone people and email them to tell them how much they mean to you and the difference they have made to your life.  None of us know which of us will get out of this alive, but all of our woods will have felled trees for sure and far better to share our appreciations and gratitude now than to wish we had.

We need to make like trees

‘When trees grow together, nutrients and water can be optimally divided among them all so that each tree can grow into the best tree it can be.’

‘This is because a tree can be only as strong as the forest that surrounds it.’
‘But isn’t that how evolution works? you ask. The survival of the fittest? Their well-being depends on their community, and when the supposedly feeble trees disappear, the others lose as well. When that happens, the forest is no longer a single closed unit. Hot sun and swirling winds can now penetrate to the forest floor and disrupt the moist, cool climate. Even strong trees get sick a lot over the course of their lives. When this happens, they depend on their weaker neighbors for support. If they are no longer there, then all it takes is what would once have been a harmless insect attack to seal the fate even of giants.”
― Peter Wohlleben, The Hidden Life of Trees: What They Feel, How They Communicate – Discoveries from a Secret World

www.julieleoni.com

Julie Leoni

Writer, Listener, Teacher, Dr

I am a stress and well-being coach who supports women to ask for what they want and look after their own needs so that they can hear their heart's call and live a more empowered and meaningful life. I draw on experience and training in bereavement, domestic abuse, mindfulness, meditation, yoga, Transactional Analysis and other therapeutic approaches to get you loving you. I have 2 sons who I love loads (and who sometimes drive me crazy). I'm a Barefoot Trained coach and I got a distinction for my post-grad cert in 2011. I have a PhD which led me to look at Emotional Intelligence in schools and I have a number of academic and professional qualifications in various types of therapy. I have practiced meditation since I went to India over 25 years ago and I'm currently training to be a yoga teacher. I have written a couple of books, I teach psychology and work with a large variety of coaching clients.

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