Guess who's back...?
....if you'll have me!
Guess who’s back...?(if you’ll have me!)
“might as well give up”, “you’re such a failure”, “you’ve let people down”, “what a wasted opportunity” - Unhelpful thoughts I’m sure we’ve all had at some point over our lives. I’ve come to the realisation that I've been prone to “run away” from situations like this in the past instead of tackling the thoughts head on, however scary the outcome might be. Those thoughts above have all run through my head at the thought of coming back here to blog.
As most people probably did, I started 2016 on a motivational “high” – I wrote a resolution list with 18 (yes, 18!) goals to achieve this year. One of these goals was to complete Chris Barez Brown’s WakeUp weekly experiments & blog about them weekly. My last blog on here was "Week4" written on the 21st January; 3 months ago; 13 weeks has passed. “I’ve failed”.
“Old” me would have decided that I’d messed up and it was best to run away and never blog on here again. Maybe you’d all wonder if I managed to move to some beautiful tropical island with no internet connection; maybe you’d decide I was another unreliable ‘flake’.
Re-reading my first ever post on here “Why I Want to Wake Up in 2016”, a line really stood out for me: “Its unfortunately true that a lot of my hobbies have fallen by the wayside recently and I can't remember the last time I didn't feel tired. I definitely feel “stuck in a rut” at the moment and am ready to take responsibility for creating my own happiness”
I was back there! I’d fallen back into “the rut” and was hoping that some undiscovered miracle was going to suddenly make me feel amazing.
There’s an overused quote, accredited to Albert Einstein, that says the definition of insanity is “doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”. If I’m really wanting to “WAKE UP”, I know that I need to step outside of my comfort zone and instead of retreating into the shadows and feeling bad about myself (like usual), I need to SHOW UP to WAKE UP!
So here I am, showing up. I’m going to dive straight back in with the WakeUp week 18 experiment of Guerilla Gardening and am not “back blogging” my missed weeks.
To anyone reading this: thank you for your understanding and patience.
To the other WakeUp champions/bloggers: I’ve loved reading your thoughts, your highs, your challenges & your insights into Chris’ weekly experiments; thank you!
To Chris: I’m sorry! I sincerely hope my “flakiness” hasn’t affected your research for what, I’m sure, will be another AMAZING book!