Let's do this.

When so many people are talking the talk, how many of us are truly walking the walk at our own pace?

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It has been a while for me on the blog and with good reason, life can be so full, and I had begun to question, am I a Writer? Is this what I want? For some of us - life - it isn’t all work, or all play, or all adventure, or all family, maybe friendships, even relationships.

For most of us we are all juggling life’s treasures and pleasures.

Me! I certainly was and I still am. Absolutely juggling! However, nowadays I am setting the pace.

And with all the talk on the life labs and leap about guilt and shame, I was prompted to write and give a personal lifestyle opinion. It is only my opinion, based on what I have read, experienced and understand, and thankfully in society today we (we, as in women) have been granted this opportunity to speak and we won’t always like what we hear, or agree, or at a push we might agree, who knows, unless we choose to read, or listen and connect for ourselves.  

In coming onboard with this emotionally embracing challenge ‘finding the self’ with this wonderful team online, I have fully immersed myself into the coaching package and opportunities that the Psychologies Magazine Team have wisely co-ordinated. This free coaching is not just for me, it is for anyone who decides to become a subscriber and self-aware.

You may be reading the magazine because it was a gift for free, it may have been a one-off copy, it may have entered your life quite by chance. You may have chosen to subscribe.  There are so many new members, it’s exciting to be privy to a concept that encourages the reader to self-assess.

Where are you at?

Are you happy?

What do you want?

Can you help yourself?

Let’s focus on wellbeing.

I have never considered myself to have mental health issues or struggle with loneliness, however, I love the subject 'psychology' and I am an absolute fan of self-empowerment; upholding my own values whether they be traditional, or liked, purely because I’d been introduced to a concept by someone or another, or generally trusting my gut, call it intuition, some people call it ‘insight’.  I've noticed that the words mental health have gone from having a stigma attached to being massively over used. Our emotions and ability to react are human qualities that help us cope and survive I prefer to consider them under them term well-being. 

As individuals we are experiencing the same Monday to Sunday, we are seeing night and day, but some of us see more of the night, others more of the day, and our diverse exchanges, connections and interactions make us singularly who we are today. I am sharing all of this with you because, when we choose to walk the walk, instead of talking the talk, we truly need to know our own limits, because nobody, absolutely no other person knows us better than ourselves.

When we choose to read a magazine, or a book, what is it that pulls us into the purchase? Is it the title? The content? Do we want to learn what we like, and what we don’t like, or maybe escape for a bit? Are we seeking knowledge?

I realised over the summer that I had become obsessed with the Writer’s World. It can happen. I am living proof in the present day. I was so obsessed, a reader and an observer, consumed with writing, upon writing, words upon words, whether a journal, poetry, or a story, I made time for little else in the free time I had. All of my other interests were slipping away.  I wasn’t exercising. I wasn’t taking a break. I was either a Writer or Mum, and I had made absolutely no time for 'ME' in my dream life and profession. I was not considering my well-being.

After taking time-out from the Writing Profession over summer, which was hard. It has become quite clear that even Writing can be an addiction without applied boundaries, limits and discipline. I chose to read my journals and diary notes and noted that I had been gaining weight, especially gaining over the last three years and I didn’t mind. It was gradual. I was accepting the changes that a more mature body brought. Even in writing this as a blog, after a good rest, call it a retreat from the writing profession, I knew I had been quite the controlled keeper of a healthy body and mind in the past and all of my life, so why had I been exclaiming to the note pages that it doesn’t matter if I gain weight? Sentences like: I am getting older. I mainly have a desk job. Who cares anyway? 

Who would have thought that ‘Writing’ could become an addictive-obsession? When all I needed was a little self-control and discipline, add a touch of professionalism and let us not forget self-care, all at a manageable pace, then who knows what the next chapter will bring. Let's do this, and if in doubt about your own tasks versus goals I suggest a read of Jane Rapin's Life Lab Blog: Your Goals Suck. It offers some helpful insight.  

With all the talk of leaping I had imagined I was ready to leap toward my dreams, but after some serious self-assessment and walking the walk instead of talking the talk, I had clearly jumped into quick-sand without a clear foundation, niche and direction, or the strength to pull myself away and say enough is enough.  I'm thankful that my family were around in the evenings to generate some disconnection from the writing obsession that had consumed me.

A little self-assessment can go a long way, and I now realise my body and physical awareness is where I need to begin my re-focus and realign in parallel work-life-balance with disciplined reading and writing schedules. This was always supposed to be about having a little fun, and what a dangerous and unhealthy process it had become. I was time for a fresh start. 

I am now ensuring my foundations, niche, directions and discipline is clear and set before I attempt to take the leap again writing my little book – at a pace that works for me.  ‘Moderation’ and ‘Balance’ have become my buzz words. 

How about you, what are you working on?

Image by Pixabay.

Julie Spencer

Ambassador and Learning Support Assistant, Psychologies Magazine

Proud Ambassador for Psychologies Magazine. The magazine encapsulates many of my core values: being kind, have compassion, look after your health and wellbeing, be professional and be supportive of others. A little self belief can go a long way. I have studied as a mature student. I went into a writing frenzy and spent 3 years writing in solitude. I was a stay at home mum, too. What I learned: being alone for long periods of time is bad for your health and wellbeing. Thanks to a little nudge from Psychologies Magazine I am reconnecting and rebuilding my C.V. I'm a creative. I have lots of ideas and I need to constantly realign my focus onto one project at a time. Until recently I had a real fear for public speaking, but after reading a book that suggested I acknowledge my fears and challenge them anyway; with the support of the Psychologies community and more I'm working through my fears one blog at a time.


Go to the profile of Jane Kirk
about 3 years ago

Thank you, another helpful insight and quote for my notebook. Enjoy your journey x