It's Time To Count Your Blessings, Raise Your Vibe And Change Your Life!

Gratitude and appreciation can be elusive concepts when 'life' gets in the way.

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It's all very well being advised to focus upon the good things in life and to count our blessings, but it can be difficult to do so. Gratitude and appreciation can be elusive concepts when 'life' gets in the way.

Despite our good intentions, many of us will still allow the negative media news, and the memories of our own bad past experiences, to get in the way of acknowledging all that we have to be thankful for in the present moment.

We can quickly revert to our familiar and ingrained default psychological position of fear – when we focus upon what's missing in our lives, and when we worry about the woes of an imagined future.

It takes committed effort to shift our default programming. Particularly if we have doubts that any form of 'positive thinking' really works - even though there is abundant research from the positive psychology movement to say that it does indeed change our perceptions, expectations and outcomes.

We can even express gratitude and appreciation for how far we've come in life - no matter how much farther we have to go. We've all overcome numerous obstacles and challenges to get here!

It can't do any harm to focus on what we do appreciate, and want more of in our lives - so we should at least give it a go!

Say to yourself...

'I really enjoy having this experience of …........... in my life right now and I'm truly grateful for how it feels.' (e.g. vibrant health, love, supportive friends, financial wealth.)

The most important aspect of this is of putting yourself in the 'feeling state' of already having the experience.

This isn't woo-woo - it's Quantum Physics!

Everything is a form of energy, and all energy vibrates – in a wide range from the very slow frequencies to the extremely fast ones.

Vibrational frequencies attract similar and they resonate together – and can create a new reality.

Gratitude has a high vibe!

Here's a good habit of gratitude and appreciation, that you can carry out every night before sleeping:-

  • Think of (or speak or write down) three things that you really do feel grateful and appreciative about from your day - no matter how small they may seem. Focus upon your feelings

  • After two nights increase this to five things - and after a week increase it to seven or more

  • Absorb your gratitude for all the good things life gives to you – and enjoy those feelings.

  • Keep repeating this process - and enjoy that higher vibe!

Gratitude and appreciation bring us more to feel grateful and appreciative about, because we attract more of what we feel. It's a winning cycle!

This process of gratitude and reward also works when you imagine already having what you deeply desire. The brain can't tell the difference between what is real and what is vividly imagined (when accompanied by the associated heartfelt feelings). 

If you focus upon feeling gratitude for something you deeply desire - as if you already have it - this creates a high vibe around it. Your sub-conscious mind and 'higher self' will then attract more of this into your life.

If what you desire in your life is a change in your own self-concept or image, or a change in your behaviour, this process of repetition - which is called Automaticity - will apparently take on average 21 days to change the way you see yourself, and an average of 66 days to change a behaviour or habit. 


Maxine Harley (MSc Psychotherapy) MIND HEALER & MENTOR - If your unhappy childhood is still getting in the way of your enjoyment of life then you will find lots of FREE resources here to help you to heal and recover - Therapeutic self-development mentoring for women who want to understand and manage their emotions, boundaries and behaviours - and to FEEL better, so they can BE, DO and HAVE better in their home and working lives - 10 online self-help workshops to help you to understand and manage anxiety, depression, anger, stress, low self-esteem/confidence, how to calm down and think straight, how to balance your mind and body, how to be happier, understanding yourself and understanding relationships - the new paradigm in therapy - which reveals and revises those unhelpful sub-conscious beliefs that are getting in your way of a calmer happier life. S.C.R.I.P.T (c) Sub-Conscious-Rules-Influencing-Present-Time

Maxine Harley

MIND HEALER & MENTOR - Psychotherapist (MSc), Author, Columnist & Blogger. Please see and, S.E.L.E.C.T. Your Life Company Ltd.

I help women to FEEL better - so they can BE, DO and HAVE better! As a MIND HEALER I specialise in helping women to recover from a troubled childhood and toxic parents, to heal and transcend their emotional wounds, re-parent their inner child, and make peace with their past. This enables and empowers them to become better parents, partners, professionals - and all round happier calmer people :-) As a MENTOR I offer different levels of therapeutic self development - including MINDING YOUR BUSINESS, MINDING THE GAP, and MIND MASTERY...please discover more at


Go to the profile of Diane Priestley
about 4 years ago

Thanks Maxine. I was feeling flat and sad as I headed off to bed, after an argument with my husband. Then I read your article. I'm focusing on gratitude for what I have right now - a full belly, a glass of water, on my bedside table, a warm duvet in a safe, cosy house. This is more than millions of people in the world have and it's good to remember that.

Go to the profile of Maxine Harley
about 4 years ago

Thanks for taking the time to comment Diane. Yes, it really helps us to regain our wider perspective doesn't it :-)