Can you please stop marketing to me

Why marketing is convincing us we need something outside of ourselves to be whole

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I am on my soap box about this one because it's really impacting the way we are with each other.

Relationships matter.

They matter to me and to you.

I believe business is about building great relationships. It's about establishing rapport, creating trust and confidence in your brand.

In my field of coaching and development there's an increasing trend towards marketing to the pain of your clients.

Bold headlines appear on emails, training programmes and latest offers that confidently assert why you are suffering in the way that you are and how they can help you turn this around.

Now, of course we need marketing but this wave of noisy marketing feels both inauthentic and out of integrity to me.

When we're talking about helping people to become their best selves and reach their potential there is a vulnerability in there that needs to be met with compassion and authenticity.

Clients are more than their circumstances.

They are more than their opinion of themselves.

They are souls who are longing to be expressed and have often forgotten what lights them up, where they're naturally brilliant and what their purpose is.

It's not a case of putting on my layers and perfecting them.

It is a case of remembering.

Remembering what it was like to get so caught up with doing what they love that time seemed to stop.

Remembering what it was like to feel that the work they did really made a difference and had a positive impact on another human being.

That's why I get so frustrated with killer headlines that have you believe you need something other than your natural self in order to shine.

It's why I loved the concept of Zapnito because it offered a promise of reducing the noise.

So, if you find yourself succumbing to marketing tactics, please take a breath, feel your feet on the ground and ask yourself, "Do I really need this?"

Vanessa Anstee

Life Coach

I'm inspired by who you can be without apology and I want to help you let your real self shine. I've been a life coach for 10 years. I've always been a seeker trying to discover a way of being in life that feels soulful, authentic and aligned to what my heart wants not what my head thinks I should have, be or do. I spent 20+ year career in HR, OD, talent management and executive coaching. My kids were my biggest wake up. I saw the way I was working wasn't working anymore. I couldn't keep pushing myself harder. I had to accept I couldn't attain this perfected version of myself that I had strived most of my life to achieve. I had to find love not from accolades and other people's acceptance but from deep inside me. That's when I learnt to connect to my heart, heal my childhood wounds and fears of never being enough and set light to my passion in a completely new way. I want one thing for my clients. Be real. Be themselves, fall madly in love with that person and honour their soul's calling.


Go to the profile of Charles Thiede
almost 8 years ago
Hi Vanessa. Thanks so much for this. Its a really interesting challenge for us to not push out too many marketing messages and reminders and noisy emails. At the same time these are tools for bringing people back to the site and driving engagement. It has to be desired and useful. Creating value amongst the noise is a major challenge for organizations. And the answer is right at there. Its the relationships they already have and having a small room of engagement.