Week 42 Falling in Love again ! Turning my back on self criticism

This week we were asked to create two lists one listing what we loved about ourselves and one listing what we find negative about ourselves

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My mother is a wise octogenarian, who having had 6 children, 11 grandchildren , and I loose count of great grandchildren knows a thing or two about strategies to keep happy. She has a simple philosophy in life that she has passed down to me, its about not having an excess of anything in life but a little bit of everything.. she and dad used to let their hair down in the local on a Saturday night and on a Sunday she would go next door to the Chapel for a bit of spiritual wellbeing. She believes in balance, a little bit of what you fancy does you good, have the cake but go for a walk afterwards…so this two list approach really appealed to me and made it easier to do because I felt I was balancing everything out. I think for me it very much depends how I was feeling on the day as to whether positive or negative would reign supreme. If I would have compiled these lists last Thursday the negatives would have far out weighed the positives, but today was a good day so it was fairly even. For example I’m generally very responsible however I do take risks which I like about other people and if I look at myself objectively I like that about me too. I think I’m pretty good at sussing people out and I definitely have a bullshit detector but hand in hand with that I can also be judgemental. Over this year of Wake up I’ve realised that I’m OK, I’d be friends with me. That negative self criticising voice has lessened although it still occasionally pipes up like last Thursday. I had fun with this today and I took Chris’s advice and took a deep breath and smiled. So I’m not perfect, I recognise my flaws but I’m caring less about them and learning to respect and perhaps be amused by all my foibles - its who I am it's what make us human. Ok so I wonder who this tired looking woman is staring back at me when I look in the mirror and I sometimes squidge that spare tyre but you know what we are lucky to have a healthy body and we should be thankful for it looking after us for so many years when we don't always look after it. Love and light to all you imperfect unique people out there, a new mantra can be born 'put an end to putting yourself down today' x

Ffi Ffi Trixibelle

I'm a single parent of ONE lovely lanky teenager.. I live in deepest rural Wales . My 'proper' job is in marketing and events but I am also a trained reflexologist, masseur and reiki giver (go figure!) I also look after my Mum who is in her late 80's, my dog Ted, my cat Black and my hens and goldfish...my dream is to have a small holding and offer people holidays in my teepee and maybe the odd therapy ....so as you can see I am a mass of contradictions.... I like to walk, do yoga, eat salad and visit new places but I also like to drive fast, Feast ice lollies, vodka on Friday's with friends(, which leads to dancing in my kitchen) my coffee , and staying up late... I can be outgoing but also extremely shy so like the rest of you I am still trying to figure it out one day at a time...


Go to the profile of Jacqui
Jacqui over 4 years ago

Oh Fi I love your mum's advice. Here's to our foibles- how I love that word. I absolutely agree with all you say. We only have one life and as long as we are motivated by kindness and respect why waste that life with self criticism! Lots of love Fi

Go to the profile of Ffi Ffi Trixibelle
Ffi Ffi Trixibelle over 4 years ago

its a fab word isn't it. Yes she's a lovely woman and I'm so very lucky x

Go to the profile of Vanessa
Vanessa over 4 years ago

I love what Wake-Up seems to have done for us - so much positivity in these posts! You are so right, our traits ebb and flow with life and we're best to learn to love them all.

Go to the profile of Mark Cuddy
Mark Cuddy over 4 years ago

I love your positiveness and I love your bullshit detector. When I went back to my roots earlier this year my brother told me I used to be skilled in the art of detecting a bullshitter. "You were always right, Mark. " He said. But then I had to wonder if I'd lost that bullshit detector because I was no longer living in the jungle. It may well have been a skill I learned or I was born with. Who knows but it was good to read someone else had the same skills. Also you're mum is 100% spot on. I love the lessons the older generation can pass on to the younger ones. Wise words I call it. Lovely post, as ever, thanks for sharing.

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Mark Cuddy over 4 years ago

Forgot to mention I love the photo, the reflections on the lake and the green of the trees - enchanting.

Go to the profile of Ffi Ffi Trixibelle
Ffi Ffi Trixibelle over 4 years ago

I am truly amazed that Vanessa you've commented on my positiveness I am in person not really known for it but this year has really been a turning point for me. Mark, I don't think you ever loose that skill I think its in built. Maybe wisdom passed down..my Dad had a saying ' from the young you get the truth', as I was always being too honest and putting my foot in things, being older and wiser , I prefer to listen now, analyse and process. Oh and its a river in a very pretty village I grew up in, I used to take our sheep dog there as a teenager, he'd jump in after sticks but was hopeless at hurding the sheep! Dad taught me how to skim stones there and I had camping parties there when I turned 18, its a special place to me.

Go to the profile of Chris Baréz-Brown
Chris Baréz-Brown about 4 years ago

What a fantastic post Fi, loving that new mantra...huge love C x