Are you making decisions for yourself?

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Sometimes, we make decisions that we believe are right for us, yet we later wonder what we were thinking.  How can this be?

There are of course many reasons we may have mistaken what was good for us to do.  One common theme is that sometimes we make decisions that are more connected to what we believe we ought to do than what we intuitively feel and sense is right for us.

It may be that we put the interests of someone else first.  Or that we follow social conventions without considering their appropriateness for the individual situation.  Or that we in that moment lack advocacy for ourself and our needs.

Whenever you are making a decision, big or small, it can be useful to check out where your attention is.  Are you looking at it through your own eyes, with a grounded sense of your own body and feelings? If you are empathising for someone else are you doing this from a place of remaining connected to your own wisdom and knowing?  Are you giddy and up in your head, or have you a felt sense of your maturity and bodily reactions?

Deciding what is good to do calls us to consider our impact on others, and on the world at large.  Of course it does. Added to this, it calls us to consider our own place in the wonder of life, and to include our-self and our needs as part of our decision making process.


Go to the profile of Fe Robinson, Psychotherapist

Fe Robinson, Psychotherapist

I am here to help you thrive, whatever life brings. I offer Psychotherapy, EMDR therapy and Couples Counselling to clients based in Durham. I am UKCP Accredited and an EMDR Europe Practitioner, and offer Clinical Supervision to counsellors and psychotherapists locally. I have worked in private practice, the NHS, and in charitable organisations, with a wide range of clients and conditions.

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