Avoiding The Life Coach ‘Guru Trap’ This New Year
January is one of those months where many people think 'New Year, New You'. If you have been considering hiring a life coach, here is my ESSENTIAL, no holds barred guide to gaining the most from working with one.
If you are stuck in a job, relationship, country or career you hate to the point that you can feel the life-force draining out of you every minute of every day, chances are that you’ve been dreaming of creating a big, inspiring and dramatic life change with more desire and oomph than usual, at the start of this new year.
I know this because I have been there too.
January is one of those months when I notice a spike in the numbers of clients on my books and I know the same is true for many who offer life coaching services too. There is nothing more natural than thinking new year, new you.
If you have been considering hiring a life coach or mentor, I want to give you the inside scoop on what you can reasonably expect from working with one. I know that if you take my advice to heart, it will immediately begin saving you a lot of money, heartache and time.
My work as a Life-Change Strategist is all about helping real, everyday, earnest folks create lasting happiness, freedom, fulfilment and alignment in their lives. In my personal and professional experience over the past 15 years however, here is what I have come to know:
- Success and happiness are first and foremost, an inner job
- There is no guru or magic bullet - nothing that anyone will come along and suggest you do, without the deep inner work to back it up - that will profoundly and permanently change your outer life
- No one else really knows the unhappiness, emotional turmoil and pain you’re going through
- No one is going to rescue or save you
- No one is going to ‘do the work’ for you and give you an easy ride
- No one knows you or what feels like a good ‘fit’ in your life better than you do
- You don’t have to figure it out all on your own
In fact, with regards to the last point, this mindset of stubbornness and martyrdom is often deeply rooted in long held beliefs such as “I can’t afford to hire a coach” and/or “Yes, I want change but deep down, I don’t really see how it can happen for me.”.
Be forewarned however, as a start, you are better off committing to getting to the root of these limiting beliefs.
And, I am going to let you in on one more critical truth here:
Taking the decision to go it alone or not be an action taker and wait for a bolt of lighting to strike and magically transform your life, is the longest, hardest, most stressful, unhappy and expensive route to ‘transformation’ you can take.
And the sad thing is that nothing ever changes. Nobody who follows this route ever gets any different outcome in the end.
The next thing you need to know is that different coaches have different business models and ways in which they deliver their best work.
In my boutique-style practice, there is no hierarchy or coaching ‘team’. There is just me. My clients are high-level and VIP clients because they have already been ‘round the houses’ with lower level/ lower cost offerings and have come full circle again. They have been down the alluring, shiny paths of promise and realised that their place of greatest impact and power has been there all the while, lying dormant within themselves.
I personally have never seen powerful 1:1 support being offered as part of no and low cost coaching packages, promotions or ‘deals’. There really is no such thing as something for nothing and in the personal development world, this couldn’t be more true.
The bottom line here is that to change your life, you are going to need proper guidance and support because what you have been doing on your own up to this point hasn’t been getting you the results you need.
You have reached an impasse and more than anything, you need a work-around…a paradigm shift in the way you view yourself and your world.
This is exactly what a brilliant life-coach will provide you with - from Day 1.
But in order to leave your old, unhappy life behind, the reality is that you must be ready to invest.
You have to really understand that the cost of investing in your happiness, your life and yourself is actually priceless and that bargaining for your growth serves no one.
Least of all, you.
- Believe you are ready and worth it
- Are willing to trust yourself to step beyond your comfort edge and land safely on the other side
- Understand that the coach you have thoroughly researched and have in mind is providing a very bespoke, expert container for you to more fully know and experience your full potential and TRUTH
- Are willing to allocate the necessary funds, and
- Take ultimate responsibility for your decisions and fate,
There is nothing that can compare to the level of service and transformation you will receive.
Finally, as a recipient of life coaching, you will gain the most benefit if you:
1. Are willing to suspend your disbelief and be open to guidance and new perspectives.
In a powerful transformational space based on mutual trust and respect, many of my clients begin to discover how much personal liberation and choice is available to them - and always has been - once they release their hold on what they think they know and begin to allow their long-held assumptions and beliefs to wobble and shift.
2. Allow the guidance you receive to shine a light on what your own intuition is saying about what is true for you right now.
There is no cookie cutter method you or any coach can apply to craft for you, a meaningful, happy, fulfilling life. Your beautiful life naturally begins to unfold once, with the help of your coach, you’ve gotten in touch with your inner wisdom and identified the cornerstones and characteristics of your nature, history and life that make you unique. Consciously grounding into and growing these cornerstones through mini-goals (as opposed to familial and societal ones you have haphazardly been assigned) is how you kick off your process of transformation and truly begin living a life that you love.